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【"eroticizing rape" "anime"】Instagram husband's parody wellness account is comedy gold

It's nigh-on impossible to scroll through Instagram without stumbling upon a post about #wellness.

But,"eroticizing rape" "anime" one "Instagram husband" has had enough of assisting his aspiring wellness influencer girlfriend and has launched his very own parody account. And, it's a thing of wonder.

SEE ALSO: Hilarious Instagram account is as sick of the #EatClean craze as you are

Edward Lane, who's a journalist at Men's Health, says he's spent the last 18 months behind the camera as "Chief Photographer or Despondent Instagram Husband" to his girlfriend and "aspiring influencer" Amy Hopkinson AKA @wellness_ed.

He says that before they started dating, he saw social media as "a place to tag friends so they could watch a funny video of a dog riding a unicycle." But, now that Amy and Edward are dating, his eyes have been well and truly opened.

View this post on Instagram

"All of a sudden I was having to stand on the sofa behind her to get a good angle of some porridge unsanitarily close to her feet, or awkwardly skulk behind her to avoid being caught on her morning story. I thought the whole thing was insane," says Lane.

"Literally hundreds of people were double-tapping a picture of my girlfriend eating salad – it made absolutely no sense to me. But most of all it cracked me up," Lane continued. He said he was impressed by influencers and their followers' passion for "leggings, protein balls and avocados" and saw "too many opportunities for ridicule to pass up."

View this post on Instagram

"Plus, I was sure I'd look damn good in a pink sports bra," he added. So, he set up a parody account. And so, @Wellness_Ted was born.

So, who is Wellness Ted? According to his Insta bio, he's an "unqualified" personal trainer and "knowledge-free nutritionist" who's "preaching wellness one self-important #wellfie at a time."

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Lane has created his own versions of some of the typical things you might find on a wellness blogger's Instagram. There's before and after shots, inspirational quotes and mid-work out photos. But, it's unlikely you'd find any of his #foodstagrams anywhere near a real wellness blogger's account.

Lane believes the whole #wellness scene takes itself far too seriously, and his parody account is a reaction against that.

View this post on Instagram

Lane thinks that wellness bloggers believe they're fighting "the good fight against unhealthy lifestyles." And, he says he thinks it's "insane" how much power they wield.

"They truly believe that they're on the front line, getting their hands dirty, while also swanning about in £500 ($649) worth of free activewear on glamorous fitness retreats paid for simply by tagging the resort into an Instagram post," says Lane.  

View this post on Instagram

"I just wanted to take the piss out of a lot of people who present themselves as holier-than-thou health crusaders, but who are actually using it as a free ticket to some south west London luxury lifestyle," says Lane.

View this post on Instagram

Parody aside, however, Lane finds the Instagram #wellness trend pretty alarming. He believes that some influencers don't caveat their posts and present them as opinion, rather than gospel truth.

"There's been enough research into social media to reveal that there are a lot of vulnerable people out there looking for direction, and the problem is that the boring science of a top-end nutritionist or trainer just isn't as sexy or appealing as the pretty girl subsisting on brunch and HIIT workouts," says Lane.

Given that Instagram has recently been ranked the worst social network for young people's mental health and wellbeing, Lane may have a point. And, Instagram's highly-curated nature is one of the reasons behind its damaging impact.

View this post on Instagram

He says that no amount of "post-gym, no make-up selfies or avocado recipes" will be able to combat Instagram's body positivity issues.

"Although, neither are my pictures of turkey dinosaurs. However, I'm sure people would be far more likely to smile when faced with a plate of potato than kale," says Lane.

Sign us up to Lane's version of #wellness!


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